Bikers of Baghdad 
Volume 1, Issue 5 July 2006
Change in BoB Leadership Folks, somewhat unexpectedly, and due to
real world mission requirements, the Presidency of our illustrious group is
passing from myself to Jim Perkins (see bio below). The Army has lowered
its standards and selected me both for promotion to Lieutenant Colonel and
Command. As such, and with much regret, I am compelled to pass the BoB
guidon so I can focus on my primary leadership role within the Army. After
close to a year I take distinct pleasure in being an integral part in the
launching of this group, and though still fledgling in many respects, I
think we’re off to a great start with many fine members, some still
deployed, spread from Australia to Canada and from Iraq to Washington DC . I will remain active in the group as a full member and will maintain the
website until a savvier computer guru takes it to the next level. Please welcome Jim as our new President, a
burden he happily accepted despite the fact he remains in harm’s way in Baghdad. Please keep Jim in your thoughts and prayers because the work the Police advisors
do in training and equipping the Iraqi Police is as dangerous a job as
kicking in doors looking for badguys. The Police advisors are on the road a
lot going to various Iraqi Police stations to ensure they’re up to the job.
I’ve been to many memorials in Baghdad for fallen American Police Advisors
and they’re serving as selflessly as those of us in uniform. Jim, thanks for accepting the job as
President. I know you’ll do great. Thanks to everyone’s support of my efforts
to date. Please continue that great support as Jim takes our group to the
next level. BoB Rides with the
Patriot Guard Riders. As many of you know BoB is listed as one of the groups
officially approved to ride with the Patriot Guard Riders (PGR). I’m sure
by now everyone knows what the PGR is and what the members do and I have
personally ridden with the PGR on many occasions both as a proud member of
BoB (displaying our club patch with much pride) and as a proud member of
the PGR. Tragically this past month members of the Westboro
Baptist Church (WBC) showed up at the main gate of Fort Campbell during our monthly memorial service. While we were mourning our honored war dead they
were cheering the losses. It’s not the first time I’ve seen these lunatics
but it’s always a kick in the gut knowing such people celebrate the deaths
of our beloved soldiers. Fortunately the PGR were there yet again, in force, to
stand between the misguided WBC and Fort Campbell, demonstrating that
service to our country is a noble cause in or out of uniform. After
adroitly putting these wackos in their proper place as a marginalized and
lunatic fringe cult group, the PGR attended the memorial service as welcome
guests and participants. I wish to extend a collective BoB “Thank You” to all the
PGR everywhere who stand as a solid example of why we serve. They truly
demonstrate the character of the American people and our pride in our
nation. Despite the fact that the WBC are Americans, the truth of our
nation is represented in the men and women who traveled hundreds of miles
from many states, to stand against these misguided and hateful protesters. BoB and the PGR stand together as brothers in truly
trying times. As we serve in harm’s way for the security of our nation,
please keep in mind the PGR is keeping the home front safe from those who
would undermine our way of life at home.
Member Profile:
Jim Perkins Jim Perkins is a retired
police officer from Wichita KS where he got paid to ride as a motor officer
for 9 years of his public service (now that’s a racket, you get paid to
ride while serving your community, Jim should have offered the tax payers a
refund just for the privilege!!!!) After
retiring he moved to northeastern Oklahoma to live on Lake Tenkiller, where he returned to higher education completing a BA with a major in Psychology and
minor in Political Science and Mathematics. Currently he is pursuing his
Doctorate in Experimental Social Psychology with a minor in Statistics.
(You gotta be kidding; he’s smart AND rides a Harley!!!!) Jim
has ridden Harleys since his teenage years (I think that was close to when
Harley was founded), starting with one of those early dual sprocket 125cc
Harleys. His current ride is a 2000 FatBoy (yeah baby, FatBoy is THE
ride), kitted out with a Screamin’ Eagle Carb kit, windshield, mustache
bar, and sissy bar (his wife has to ride somewhere, and on the handlebars
isn’t preferred!). Jim
is married with four daughters (aha, payback for past sins no doubt),
currently living in western Kansas about an hour west of Dodge City. Jim
reports that his home boasts two of the finest golf courses in the country
but he was unceremoniously booted off the course one day for using his
scoot as a golf cart (geez people get worked up about the smallest
things!). Jim
is currently serving his country yet again in sunny Baghdad, keeping the
Iraqi Police trained and equipped so they can serve their country. Biker Humor:
(Redneck Edition) Redneck Driving Etiquette: - When
approaching a four-way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires always has
the right of way. You Might be a Redneck Biker if: - At least
two parts of the bike are primer-colored. - You are
written up by Game Wardens 'cause you put extra headlights on your bike so
you could go night-shooting on it. - You put deer
horns on the bike handlebars. - You
painted your bowling ball orange and black. - You have
used the engine of the bike to barbecue road kill. - Everyone
in your motorcycle club has the same grandpa. - As you go
down the highway, you can almost taste the flavor of each kind of roadkill
you pass on the highway. Redneck Etiquette for All Occasions: -Never take
a beer to a job interview or ask if they press charges. - Always
identify people in your yard before shooting at them. - Always say
"Excuse me" after getting sick in someone else's car. - It's
considered tacky to take a cooler to church.
- Never tow another car using pantyhose and duct tape.
- When sending your wife down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to
ask her to bring back beer.
- Never relieve yourself from a moving vehicle, especially when driving.
- Do not remove the seats from the car so that all your kids can fit in.
- Do not lay rubber while traveling in a funeral procession.
- Even if you're certain that you are included in the will, it's considered
tacky to drive a U-Haul to the funeral home.
- The socially refined never fish coins out of public toilets, especially
if other people are around.
- Always provide an alibi to the police for family members.
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